This afternoon was a doozy!
There are internet trolls everywhere. Clearly it is much easier to say mean, disrespectful, hurtful things to people while sitting behind a computer and typing on a keyboard. I often wonder if these people would say what they are saying if they were face to face with the person they were being so cruel to.
Now I know not everyone is a fan of every body type. Some people like women who are curvy, skinny, rounder, pear shaped, dare I say muscular. We women come in all shapes in sizes, just like men, GASP!
One of my favorite physique competitors is Dana Linn Bailey. She works her butt off, I admire her dedication, work ethic and honesty. Not everyone is a fan of her physique and her photos are often full of comments from people telling her that she looks like "a disgusting man", "a roided out chick dude", I could go on and on but I won't.
Today she posted a selfie and in the caption she talked about feeling down after her previous competition and that she mentally let herself break down. Personally it really hit home because I myself as we all know just had my own little mental break down in regard to competing on Sunday. So I decided to comment on her photo. My comment drew in a really creepy internet troll, I've never really dealt with one but I was blown away by his complete disrespect towards Dana and then myself. He obviously doesn't know either one of us but it was very easy for him to sit at his keyboard and be cruel.
I was so upset, SO upset. I decided to screenshot the comments, when I refreshed the page he had deleted some of his comments so I didn't get everything but I will fill you in.
Now I didn't really get upset until the guy called me a "roided out chick dude". Really? The screenshot on the left was the beginning of the conversation, the one on the right is the end. He deleted all of his comments he had left after the "roided out chick dude" comment, why, I have no idea. You would think he would have wanted to remove all of his horrible comments.
He responded to my NANBF competitor comment with, "arod was tested". Apparently that means that because A-Rod the baseball player was tested and got away with it means that I take steroids and manage to still pass my polygraphs and urine tests. Believe me, I am a natural competitor and I do not take steroids or anything else that would be considered illegal by the NANBF. I take protein, pre-workout and BCAA's, clearly that gives me an edge and that is why I've made it to the Olympia stage *sarcasm*.
His response when I mentioned hoping he didn't have a daughter, because truly thinking of this man raising a little girl TERRIFIES me, was that he DOES have a daughter. The comment he deleted was that he hoped to raise her so she doesn't ruin herself like I have ruined myself.
That is why I made that final comment, this man acted like he knows me and that is creepy. I was being 100% honest as I told him that I hoped he saves such horrid behavior for the internet rather than show his attitude toward women to his daughter.
The other gents weren't very kind either, trying to stick up for me and get the dude off of my post. Honestly in a way I kind of appreciated their attempts, but THIS is one big reason why women are afraid to be who they are, to let people know who they are, to show that they are STRONG and CONFIDENT. Because of cruel people like this man.
It makes me so incredibly sad. Be kind to others, you may not agree with what they do. You know what though, you do NOT have to make cruel comments on their photos or make cruel comments that a fan left on a photo. I was not the woman who posted the photo, I was simply a fan of Dana Linn Bailey and I got disrespected.
I do not have a son but if I did I would be certain to raise him to be respectful of everyone, especially women. I would raise him to speak as if anyone can hear or read what he says. That man's employers would be able to see his crude comments, I doubt they would like to have that type of representation.
The internet is cruel. I've always known it can be, but I was never affected personally quite like today.
Be kind, uplift each other, show love and generosity instead of unprovoked hatred and disrespect.
I hate that I let that man get to me like he did this afternoon. Thank you if you read this, I NEEDED this vent. I will hug my daughter so extremely tight when I pick her up after work and remind her over and over again how extraordinary, special and beautiful she is, no matter what anyone says. I will also say that to myself and remind myself that I am proud of who I am, a hard working mother, a loving wife, daughter, sister, aunt, cousin and friend, a woman who is proud of her accomplishments and has many more achievements to make.