We took my body fat last night, I'm at 10.9%, I will definitely be 10% or lower for the competition, that makes me very, very happy :) I'm feeling good, really, really, really good. I honestly feel like for my first competition I'm in an awesome place, I have great muscle mass, awesome definition and I will just get more defined over the next 10 days.
Emotionally I have been a little bit off, not for any reason in particular. I'm very close with all of my family, especially my mom. She knows me like no one else, we talk on the phone every day, if I don't call her for two days she calls me worried. I've been lacking in phone calls because I normally call her on my lunch hours and I've been working out on my lunch hours lately.
She called me at work yesterday because I wasn't feeling well in the morning and had a temp so I stayed home. I was supposed to watch my niece Evey so I let my sister Mindy know what was going on, she called our mom to see if she could watch Evey and told mom I was home sick. I felt better after sleeping and ended up going in to work for a half day. My mom called me and asked me if I was ok, I told her I was, she asked again and if I was sure, I again told her yes. We chatted for a bit and I reassured her again that I am just fine. When I hung up I felt more "off", I can't explain it. I don't know if it was her asking and knowing how well she knows me that even a simple change in my voice can have her realizing there is something off. I had a strong moment of just wanting to cry for a bit, again for no particular reason, just like I HAD to cry.
For a moment I felt like a crazy person but then Summer, the gal I've been in touch with on Facebook told me she has had some meltdowns and another competitor has said the same thing. On bodybuilding.com there is one I'm in contact with that gave me the best advice, the same advice my sister Laura has given me about letting emotions out, she said to just let it out, there really is nothing wrong with me but I'm putting my body through so much, my hormones are being affected and I'm going to feel damn emotional. The funny thing is that what I'm feeling the most right now is pride, I'm so damn proud of myself for how far I've come and seeing this through that it does make me want to cry.
So mom if you are reading this, I am fine, I promise. This is just such a major event in my life right now and I'm experiencing so much every moment of every day. If I cry it is ok, if I need help I WILL reach out, I'm surrounded by so much support and I am so, so thankful for that.
Now onto my progress, sorry for the sappiness for a moment there :) Last night was chest and back, Kyle went with me and put me through quite the workout. It involved some heavy weights and some lights weights, push ups on a bench where you push yourself off and clap between push ups, those were hard. I pushed myself so hard, instead of 15 reps at the end of each set I did 20 reps, this is my last week for this type of lifting and I'm going to give it my everything! Afterwards I did 32 minutes on the step mill, sweated my ass off and felt pretty darn good!
I have a photo to share from last nights workout and one from Saturday night, my cousin Miles is impressed with my arms, maybe even a tad bit jealous ;) We arm wrestled and he beat me, but I lifted arms that day so we have a rematch scheduled for November 2nd!
Nutrition for today:
Breakfast - Tilapia, 5 egg whites, one grapefruit
Snack - Swai, 7 almonds
Lunch - Chicken breast, 1/4 avocado, 1/2 cup sweet potato
Snack - Tuna, 1/4 avocado, 7 almonds
Dinner - Tilapia, chicken breast, spinach salad
Water - 162 oz.