Today was my first posing practice in the suit, holy crap, felt so vulnerable and awkward at first. I knew it would be a smaller version of any swim suit I owned and not cover much, but holy crap, there's no hiding anything in this sucker!
Kyle and David kept reassuring me that I look amazing, I picked myself apart like crazy, hopefully after doing lots of sprint and serious HIIT cardio Kyle made up for me this week I will feel better. I know I have been working my butt off for these past nine months and I do know that I don't look bad, it is hard to explain, this process is proving to be very difficult for me mentally. I know it is hard for Kyle when he hears me pick myself apart like I do, I am striving for my idea of "perfection" and I need to stop it.
There are so many pro figure competitors that talk about their stretch marks, flabby skin, cellulite, they pick themselves apart but remind themselves and those of us that follow them that it is part of who they are, part of their body that will never go away. Competition week you don't see that, peak week stretches everything so tight and the competition tan hides it all, for that moment you are your own idea of "perfection". I'm trying to mentally prepare myself for the judges comments and what they will tell me I need to work on and not take it in a negative light, just remind myself I've worked so hard for this, no one, besides my family and awesome friends that follow my blog know how hard I've been working for this. I won't know all the other competitors stories on that stage, just that we've all worked our asses off to be able to compete against each other and no matter what each of us have made an amazing accomplishment and no matter the outcome we are all amazing, beautiful, strong women who should be extremely proud of ourselves.
Ok, off my soap box now ;) Who wants to see my suit???? I did a couple comparison photos, the first photos are from June and the others are from today, my first day in my suit. I also wore my pretty jewelry, still need to find a sparkly ring though and maybe one more bracelet.